"Dear Diary"

...fed cat, washed dishes, wrote blog entry.

Season 1 Episode 17 (episode 17 overall)

Original broadcast date: 3rd January 1989

Writer: Jimmy Hibbert
Additional voices: Dr. Von Goosewing/ Dr. Von  
                               Gosling/Radio announcer: 
                               Jimmy Hibbert
                                Innkeeper: David Jason

                                1st peasant: Brian Trueman

                                Reinfelt/2nd peasant: Jack May
Joke credit: Diary - Phil O'Fax

Castle transport visual not used.

While writing about his daily life (or living death) in his diary, Duckula is interrupted by Igor who remembers that the Count's great-grandfather also kept a diary. What follows is an interesting look into the past via sepia-themed pastiches and a case of history repeating itself but with a twist.

'My diary, Igor, is my business and no-one else's - until it's published that is.'  (Duckula, still with a view to fame even when writing private memoirs)

This one of those handful of deliberately less-funny-than-usual episodes, although the ending is wryly comic in an ironic sort of a way. A lot of the traditional horror movie staples are in place here via the aforementioned flashbacks: the coffin lid being raised to admit the vampire into the thundering night, the earnest 'you've got to believe me!' friend of the hero character, the tense village inn of oppressed peasants etc. Though, uniquely, all these scenes play out of order, from different characters' perspectives, allowing the viewer to piece together the story as a whole. The little vignettes themselves are especially memorable and it's almost a shame we never got more of them in future outings. A similar theme would be explored in 'The Rest Is History', which is another good episode to watch along with this one for the same kind of lore, with the laughs taking a respectful back-seat.

After discussing with Igor about the older diary, they both share a rare agreement that it would at least make an interesting read. Igor confesses however that he doesn't know where it is. Nanny, crashing through the ceiling (twice in as many episodes!) does know and reveals said diary is to be found propping up Duckula's bed. So after Nanny lifts the bed effortlessly, the Count reads (or re-reads, when you think about it) his great-grandfather's diary, prompting the first flashback:

19th century Igor descends to the castle dungeons and opens the coffin, in which lies the resting vampire. This is where we're introduced to a past incarnation of Duckula and blimey is he evil and creepy! David Jason gives him a really raspy, horrible sounding voice, at total odds with the more familiar Count's upbeat and friendly tones. Igor, of course sounds and looks exactly the same! Though it does seem a little odd that he wears the same outfit - not sure if that style of suit would have been in vogue at the time the flashback occurs. Clearly he was not only a butler, but a trend-setter! Interestingly, Nanny is heard in this scene too, but does not appear onscreen. If I were being cynical I'd say this was to avoid having to design her outfit too, but it could be a case of deliberate vagueness allowing the possibility of it being a different character. Next we are introduced to Dr. Von Gosling, one of Goosewing's ancestors - posing as a newspaper photographer. Just as Duckula's previous incarnation is portrayed as a more traditional vampire, so is Goosewing's ancestor depicted as a more equal force for good, on the same level of competency.

Unlike the bumbling vampire hunter we're familiar with, Gosling is more organised, calm and collected and appears to know exactly what he's doing. He's a really interesting character and this is perhaps why he is used in all three of the flashback sequences. Jimmy Hibbert also varies the voice he uses for his doppelganger character - Gosling still has the German accent, but it's much more understated, calmer and less comical. In a way it's even more impressive than the way David alters his two versions of Duckula, because you can believe that this is exactly what Goosewing would sound and act like if he were less excitable and more competent. I also get the impression that Gosling seems to be a little bit younger so maybe Von Goosewing was more like Von Gosling in his youth? We'll never know for sure, but it's fun to speculate. The current Count should count (pun intended) himself lucky that Goosewing isn't as efficient as Gosling as he'd certainly stand even less of a chance of a quiet life. Von Gosling uses a camera with a stake loaded into it, the idea being to pretend to photograph the Count and project the stake right at him. Unfortunately (for Gosling) all it does is knock the beast over and Gosling (displaying a bit of characteristic Goosewing excitability) runs off without checking for sure if he's really been destroyed. We can forgive him for this - he's less familiar with the whole vampire mythos at this stage. It's early days.

After reading this powerful instalment, Duckula decides that selling the diary to the press would be a good money-spinner so off he goes to set the wheels in motion. While doing this, he is unaware that Goosewing has tapped his 'phone line and is listening in. What a snoop that guy can be! I like how he gets a chuckle out of Duckula getting crossed lines more often because of this intervention. Hey, if you can't slay the vampire, you can at least annoy him. VG gets the idea to take advantage of Duckula expecting the newspaper people to show up and decides to pose as a member of the press to gain access to the castle. While looking for a decent disguise, he comes across his great uncle's diary and the camera he used. Keen viewers will begin to notice the history repeating itself aspect slowly creeping in.

The next two flashbacks occur while VG is reading the diary. The first involves Von Gosling's conversation with an earnest friend. More horror tropes are checked here - stormy night, panicked character explaining about the vampire, etc. although there's a bit of visual humour when VG suddenly pings down a plastic bat on a string. Jack May provides the voice of Gosling's pal Reinfelt and together they deliver one of the most memorable (to me) exchanges in the whole series.

Von Gosling: No, no, you must be mistaken, the last Count Duckula died centuries ago.
Reinfelt: I know and yet he lives!

Thankfully, Gosling is convinced that Reinfelt is not mad and sets out to Transylvania to hunt the vampire in the next flashback. There follows another classic trope, one that was also ticked in 'Igor's Busy Day' - the 'jolly peasants singing in the inn then suddenly going silent when the stranger arrives' trope! Always a favourite. At least in this instance, the peasants are won over by Gosling's honourable intentions and genuinely warm to him. There's a Fighting Fantasy game book called 'Vault of the Vampire (by Keith Martin) I often enjoy playing - this whole scene always pops into my head whenever I read the introduction. It too, portrays the weary traveller entering the local inn scenario, common to traditional vampire fiction. It's probably my favourite of all the three flashbacks.

The peasants give the Doctor a crash course in the local vampire lore (sunlight being an anathema, Igor guards the coffin, garlic and steak stake are not too popular) whereupon he gets the stake-firing camera idea. Some of the dialogue is pretty visceral for a supposed kids' show, especially when the innkeeper describes how to hammer a stake though a heart - same goes for the Reinfelt's neck-biting description in the prior sketch. David Jason does his oo-arr voice for the innkeeper as per and Brian and Jack double up as a couple of peasants.

Later, disguised very crudely as a press photographer, Von Goosewing is admitted to the castle and tries as his ancestor once did, to use the stake gun/camera on the Count. Igor is smart enough to be suspicious. He even almost identifies the camera as being the same as the one from earlier. Of course, where the camera worked for Gosling, it backfires in Goosewing leaving him charred and embarrassed. Duckula simply ushers him out and then answers the 'phone assuming it to be the real press people. It is the real press, but rather typically, they are not interested in publishing his great-grandfather's diary. One is given to wonder what they must have thought of it. Possibly they thought it was a speculative novel from a hack horror writer! It's a running theme of the series that the normal people in the show either react to Duckula with abject horror or total disinterest and a lack of respect. They probably didn't even believe the diary was even real.

We close off with the Count having a lie-in and writing in his diary once again. His mood briefly lifts when he thinks the newspaper has changed their mind and decided to publish excerpts from the diary after all. Nope! It's excerpts from the faithful butler's diary instead. Igor beat Paul Burrell to it by a wide margin! To add insult to injury, Nanny turns on the radio to listen to the readings from her diary - prompting Duckula to scream in frustration to close everything off for this entry.

Overall a tense, brooding episode, and at risk of using a cliché (well why not, the episode itself is full of good ones!) it's really thick in atmosphere. Dapples of sarcasm and social commentary on top, what with the whole 'servants selling memoirs to the press' sub-plot too.

The animation is an interesting view, it kind of resembles a mid 80s Danger Mouse episode. Thus, it shares some similarities with 'Unreal Estate' only it's more consistent and polished, so this makes me inclined to suspect that it was started earlier in production. That and the fact that the intitial shots of  Duckula at his writing desk got used an awful lot for promo images. There are times when the characters almost slip into their initial designs. The British team is responsible.

Music 

The intro is that ever-present spooky theme I taped from that Vincent Price film. Anyone got any ideas? 'Maybe Danger' by the 'Spooky Hallowe'en Players' (I have a full version of this if anyone needs it) plays as Igor opens the lid of the coffin and 'Intense Danger' (James Clarke) plays during the fight. 'Berlin' (John Leach) is heard as VG is eavesdropping. The cue heard as Gosling arrives in the village is 'Heavy Dramatic Link No.4' (Ivor Slaney) and is also used in the title card to the 'Avenger Penguins' episode 'Disgusting or What?' 'Agitiato No.1' (Derek Laren) plays during Reinfelt's scene with Von Gosling and most of of the scene in the pub. 'Unease' (track 76) by Dick Walter is also heard during the pub scene. 'Whodunit No. 2' (Slaney) plays as Goosewing enters the lounge to 'take a photo'. 'Diary of a Nanny' is underscored with 'Funny Little Man' by Wyn Henry at the end. Goosewing's recurrent oompah theme is heard as he rummages in the his chest. Still can't track that one down. There's also a recurring harpsichord riff that is used in numerous episodes heard again here. I always associate it with this show as I've only ever heard it here. Also marks the only other use of that peaceful theme we'll hear more of in 'Duck and the Broccoli Stalk' as Duckula writes in bed. It is, appropriately, 'Homage to Dracula' (b) by Paul Lewis.
 
Pans and Backgrounds 
Not many pans at all are used other than the standard opening, a nice up and down one of Duckula's very tall desk (shown above) and Von Goosewing eavesdropping. Clicking will enlarge these.

Some exteriors. 'Scuse the bats.

Trivia

• 1st episode to be broadcast in 1989. Seems appropriate as that's when most people try to start diaries, at the beginning of the year.
• Episode doesn't open with a scream (despite what the narrator says - unless he means Nanny's scream as she crashes through the ceiling) but ends in Duckula's screaming.
• Given dates in the diaries: Duckula's own current diary - Wednesday 15th February (that date actually was a Wednesday the year this first aired. It was literally a month and a bit after the broadcast), 1st flashback -  Friday October 13th, 2nd flashback - Wednesday 1st April, 3rd flashback - Tuesday 7th April. They play out in order logically (albeit with a big gap) though the 13th date doesn't work as that would have been a Tuesday too - it's always Tuesday in Transylvania! Unless we assume that either a) the Count got his dates wrong, or b) Gosling waited 2 years to strike! The dates have clearly been chosen for comedic value though so it's not worth over-thinking.
• Duckula seems to be ambidextrous. He uses his left hand at the start and his right hand at the end.
  
• Its easy to miss, but Duckula mocks Igor's voice again very briefly near the start when he goes "'Ah?' What do you mean 'ah'?"
• Victor & Hugo would also do a 'flashbacks make you go all wobbly' joke in 'Blunder on the Orient Express' also written by Hibbert.
• Given the Georgian style period costumes it's safe to assume that Duckula's great-grandfather was 'alive' around the 1800s. Current day Nanny even says that the diary has been propping up the bed for about 100 years. Von Gosling wears a powdered wig though, which may have been a little dated at that time.
• We all know Igor is about 7-800 years old, but just how old is Nanny? She is heard, but not seen, in the flashback. Perhaps it's a different Nanny? Who knows, but she certainly doesn't seem quite as old as Igor. It would fit perfectly if time were to be frozen in place inside the castle, due to the magic clock, resulting in no-one aging. 
• Igor and Duckula make the nice aperitif/a pair of teeth gag they do again in 'The Great Ducktective.'
• Goosewing inventions - well Gosling inventions to be fair - Stake-Firing Camera and 'phone-tapper. OK that second one was Goosewing's.
• Igor shows rare instances of emotion in this episode. He cries when he thinks his master has been slain and also when he gets nostalgic as Duckula reads the diary. Even (current) Duckula sounds concerned.
• When Igor apologises for his 'attack of nostalgia' Nanny offers some ointment, presumably mistaking it for neuralgia.
• Another use of the outside 'phone booth, the Transylvania Morning Sun, Goosewing's blimp and Ye Tooth and Jugular.
• Duckula uses his teleport ability to get to and from the 'phone box. His great-grandfather uses his to materialise in the hallway. 
• When Duckula gets a wrong number he says the lady on the other end sounds "like a demented turkey with a sore throat." Does this count as racial insensitivity in the Duckula-verse?
• Why exactly did Nanny want to know how to spell 'nymph'?
• Von Goosewing's mouse costume vaguely resembles Danger Mouse. He also wears a deep-sea diver's helmet. Victor would do the same in 'Water Boobies' (Victor & Hugo).
• Von Gosling's friend Reinfelt is a pun on Renfield, the mentally unbalanced character from Bram Stoker's 'Dracula.' Here though, he doesn't seem quite as mad...mad...MAD!!!!! 
• The animation of the coach arriving in the village would be re-used partly in 'Dead Eye Duck' and fully in 'The Zombie Awakes.'
  
  

  

  Top "Dear Diary", middle "Dead Eye Duck", bottom "The Zombie Awakes".
  
  

• The peasants are introduced singing 'A Frog He Would A-Courting/Woo-ing Go' only altered to be about vampires.
• The 1800s innkeeper looks exactly like the innkeeper in other, present-day, episodes. Another case of the 'identical grandson' trope. Some of the peasants too.
• Von Goosewing's assumed name is "Fritz Von Alpenhoen - ace reporter und photographer" even in his disguises he's far from modest! 2nd time Jimmy Hibbert's character uses a false moustache to gain entry to the castle. Ruffles did the same in 'Autoduck' while posing as a doctor.
• Von Goosewing of all people actually does a Nanny-ish trope by opening the door hard and slamming Igor into the wall. 
• The dart-studded Goosewing poster can be seen in Duckula's bedroom again.
• Igor shows a rare instance of agreeing that his master was right and re-thinks his earlier opinion of diaries being made public. Duckula calls Igor a turncoat and a Judas.
• This episode was released on VHS in 1988 (before it's ITV broadcast) along with 'The Vampire Strikes Back' and 'Hardluck Hotel.'

Goofs and Nitpicks
Mostly trivial stuff like cuffs, collars and lapels getting miscoloured for a second or two, though there's an especially freaky bit when Duckula's great-grandfather has the the entire top of his head flicker off for a single frame. It's during a thunder clap/lightening effect so it actually works surprisingly well.